<![CDATA[
<body>
]]>
Monday, December 26, 2005
we walked home after tat. i really love my mum. she treated mi so gd. When i'm 11yrs old, i'm becoming bad. Fights, ran out of school, bully and steal things. Well, got caught by police. Black record. Fighting and ran out of school both oso get caught as well. It's obvious though but i dun care. Till im 12yrs old, there was once a loanshark came, and i saw him outside door looking. i went over ask wad he wan. he said he finding my father. i said he went to jail liao. and he replied, u dun try to bluff mi kid. i diao him, stare into his eyes and replied loudly, U DUN BELIEVE U GO JAIL SEE FUCKER! he shouted back at mi, U DARE OPEN DOOR NOT? i replied, Y NOT!? U WAIT HERE I GO GET KEY! by the time i came out wif key, his gone. a big guy scare of mi? i dun giv a damn about those loanshark anymore. they r juz useless.
To Be Continued...
Having a father and not having a father makes a big different for me. y? wif him around, i can hav peace. But when he went in to jail, he still went to borrow money from loanshark be4 going in. for fuck? make mi and my mum suffer outside? and guess wad, he still expect mi to go visit him! he is daydreaming. i wont ever "swear" wont go visit him. u break ur fucking promise and now bring all this troubles to us. i wont call u father anymore. *Swear* dun ever think tat i will go visit u again! fucker bastard asshole. useless brother of my gd aunt. my aunt is far more better than u! at least she cares about mi. u? DUN FREAKING GIV A DAMN!
I thought i'm back wif feeling. But i'm wrong again. The feeling i have now, it's unable to describe, the feeling it's like there's no emotion. i wont laugh, wont smile, wont sad, wont feel anything for anyone, anything. there are times u see mi smile, laugh, joke everything. it's fake. my heart it's dead. wad can i do to make it revive back? and.. yin.. im sry. i'll try to break myself free from the darkness de. i wanna go wif u to the light when u're standing at. im trying to fight my way out. trying real hard....
``\\ Loving you is all bout mE //``
